


Tried to Walk

by akatsuki_tsukiyomi (Yumi25Nakashima)



Series: First Blush [6]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Angst, Break Up, F/M, Hetalia Countries Using Human Names, Stress, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 10:08:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28526730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yumi25Nakashima/pseuds/akatsuki_tsukiyomi
Summary: I’m walking on these streets without youOn my way back from leaving youI’ll forget you, I’ll erase you,my burnt and blackened love
Relationships: Germany (Hetalia)/Reader
Series: First Blush [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2089500
Kudos: 3





	Tried to Walk

**Author's Note:**

> (F/N) - Reader's First Name  
> (L/N) - Reader's Last Name  
> Ludwig - Germany's official human name
> 
> This story is inspired by B1A4's song of the same name.

(F/n) woke up to a sunny day. The birds were chirping and the weather was calm, just her type of morning. It was a weekday. Ludwig was most likely with Feliciano and Kiku on business. Although she may not admit it, she sometimes felt envious of her lover's time for his work as he was focused on it for days on end. He only ever got to properly spent time with her was on Sundays because he'd usually sleep in on Saturdays. She couldn't complain though, knowing the weight of his job and the pressure his boss put on him.

Sighing she got ready for her day and headed off to work. 

At times she wondered, what if she wasn't stuck with a lousy office job for a living? Maybe then she could try and fulfil her dream. Her German partner had always been supportive of her dreams and pushed her to follow it, but something always held her back. Fear and anxiety always crept into her mind the second she thought about pursuing what she wanted.

Sighing once more, she pushed those thoughts aside and focused on her day.

**\---**

"I'm home," came the gruff call of Ludwig as he entered their shared apartment. Immediately heading to the bedroom he placed his suitcase on his desk, right where he always put it and started changing out of his work clothes. (F/n), on the other hand, decided it was a good day for a surprise. She had prepared a cake as it was their monthly anniversary. They usually didn't celebrate it, but keeping in mind that her boyfriend would be working endlessly again the day after, she couldn't let it pass. She wanted to make him relax for once—knowing him, he would probably contradict the idea of being a 'workaholic' but she knew better—and ease out his tension.

That particular week, his boss has been even tighter on him and it was taking a serious toll on the German blond. His sleeping pattern has been severely demolished, he wakes up at midnight and goes to his desk continuing the work he left before he slept, thinking that his partner wouldn't notice. She did, though. Every time he woke, she would as well and just silently watch his back as he scribbled down and groaned every now and then. It pained her to see him like that, but she knew that if she stopped him, her attempts would be futile, as it had been before, knowing that he'd find a way to get back to his work either way.

As Ludwig came out of the bedroom, ruffling his slicked-back hair, he stopped mid-step as he saw (F/n) smiling at him by the dining table. He looked confused, and then a tad bit of frustration clouded his eyes. He couldn't be bothered with trying to read her mind and figure out what she was so giddy about but not knowing also irked him. He simply shook his head and passed her, sitting on his usual seat. She looked disheartened but shrugged it off, serving their food evenly.

**\---**

Right after dinner, the blond stood and helped clear the plates and glasses, wiping the table clean before going straight to his working desk. (F/n) sighed and let it slip. He probably needed to finish whatever he was doing.

After washing and drying the dishes, she crept behind her lover and slowly started massaging his shoulders. Apparently, this surprised him as he lost grip of his pen and abruptly stood, almost making (F/n) and his chair topple over. His agitation was evident in his furrowed brows and the volume of his booming voice.

"What are you doing?" He demanded, looking as if on the brink of exploding. She instinctively took a step back, retreating her hands to clasp them on her chest, surprised.

"I just... I just wanted to make you relax, Ludwig." She softly said, slowly as if talking to a child. Maybe it wasn't the best of options as he stomped a few feet away, running a hand through his hair. He had a deadline to meet and after an unprecedented mishap in the office earlier that day, setbacks had been made. He only had three nights to set right the mistakes of his subordinates and pick up where he left off. The looming pressure was tenfold and he could not let any other faults or distractions impede his assignment.

For the first time in a long time, he felt himself cracking. His steadfastness was close to snapping leaving little to no rationality behind.

"Stop distracting me from my work!" He fumed, pushing past her to get back to his desk. Startled and equally infuriated, she put a hand on his shoulder, making him turn back to her.

"I'm not trying to distract you. You should take a break from that. It's been weeks since you were last 'normal'. Is it wrong to ask just a little bit of your time? I can't even remember the last time we talked for at least five minutes. You've become so different because of your work, and you've put aside the things that are supposed to matter! Yes, I know that your job is important, but what about us? Can't I ask for just a little bit of your time? You can't even get past a day without almost literally bleeding out on that paperwork. I've let you get serious and I didn't do anything when you'd continue your job even past midnight, but this is seriously getting out of hand! What am I to you exactly? I'm not here just when you need me. I'm not your housekeeper, Ludwig. Ane even if I was, I surely deserve more than your cold shoulder six days a week!" Ludwig showed a hint of surprise after her sudden and breathless outburst but remained emotionless and stoic a second later. Taking a breath to compose himself, he once again put distance between them.

"(F/n), my job is very important, you know that. Why can't you see that I'm doing this for us? I'm doing this for our future. I know about the fact that we will need the money, I'm not a _dummkopf_! I'm struggling and working for the both of us here, why can't you see that?" **Idiot** His resolve slowly crumbled as he let out his frustration and anger. (F/n)'s anger had burnt out during his outburst, and now all that's remained was fear. She was getting scared, and it wasn't because of him. Not entirely. She was getting afraid that he might do something reckless. She had never seen Ludwig so angry before. 

"Ludwig, I didn't mean to make it seem that way, I just wanted you to understand that you should," He lifted his hand to cut her off.

" _Hör auf_. I've done everything I could, but," **Stop it**

**\---**

(F/n) stood, stunned. She didn't picture a break up to be like this. Whenever she thought about her man leaving, she imagined herself chasing after him, trying tactic after tactic to just make him stay. But no, she just stood. She stood as he walked past her to the bedroom to pack his things. She stood as he loaded his belongings into the car. She stood as her tears flooded her eyes and cascaded down her cheeks, not bothering to wipe them away.

By the time she was able to grasp the situation, she fell to the floor, sobbing into her hands. Ludwig, the stranger she happened to meet during an abrupt and sudden blind date, had been a friend to her before he had ever been her lover. They had many times laughed about their first encounter—two clueless strangers set up by their friends who thought they needed a relationship—but when she thought about it, it didn't seem like a laughing matter anymore. It was all just a memory, one she wished she could forever forget, or better yet never had.

It was funny how just a few words can completely change things for the better or for the worse, how just by a few words can turn things upside down.

It was painful. (F/n) felt as if her heart had been physically ripped out of her chest. She was lying on her side, still on the floor, clutching her shirt tightly. There was a painful feeling in her chest, it felt like her heart was getting squeezed, but her chest felt so empty at the same time. Violent hiccups racked her body until she was gasping desperately for air. Her tears mixed with her sweat as her hair stuck to her face but she didn't care. She didn't care if she looked like she had just been half beaten to death, because the only thought that was racing in her mind was that he was gone. He was gone and he was probably never coming back—at least not for her.

**\---**

Ludwig trudged into Feliciano's home, more infuriated than ever. It had started raining the moment he entered the cab to the Italian's house, and the fact that the Vargas slept like a log and could not hear the doorbell ringing for almost 15 minutes did not help—the German was completely drenched from head to toe the moment the door creaked open. He had a warm bath after, thankful that no water seeped into his luggage and came down to dine with Feliciano when he called.

Slipping into his sleepwear that consisted of a simple tank top and shorts, he fell onto the soft duvet of the guest room's bed. Pulling the covers to his chin, he shifted several times to get a comfortable position. It had been a while since he had slept alone. (F/n) had always been by his side from when he went into bed until he woke. The emptiness beside him was irritating him so he put several pillows on either side of him, hugging one to his chest. Clicking his tongue in dissatisfaction, he slowly fell into a dissatisfied sleep.

**\---**

_"Hör auf. I've done everything I could, but,"_

(F/n) bolted upright from her sleep, tears streaming down her face. It came to her again. She couldn't sleep, the nightmare kept repeating whenever she tried to. It just kept on haunting her, the nightmare-turned-reality of their breakup. It's the third time she woke in one night and the sun was already starting to peek out from the horizon. Sighing, she slumped back against the headboard of the twin bed. Just like Ludwig, she piled several pillows on her left and right but it still wouldn't suffice. They were all too soft to be his body.

She quickly wiped her tears away, trying to clear her head but the only thing she could think about was his last words.

_"You're dragging me down."_

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally published in Wattpad on May 21, 2016.


End file.
